Working with the leaders in an organization for several years now, I have gotten to understand how they connect with one another. At times there can be a great deal of conflict as they are unable to see eye to eye about their team challenges. Blaming rules the workplace, pointing fingers at the way different departments perform their jobs. It can even become mean spirited where little communication takes place.
In a recent leadership program a discussion emerged about why there is so much frustration between team members. People felt that they were being taken for granted and not appreciated for their contributions. Expectations were unclear so it became an environment of unfulfilled customer deliverables. There needed to be a better way to interact and work towards the organization’s mission. What was missing was a huge dose of kindness.
Five Ways To Add Kindness To Leadership
1. Locate Your Heart Beat
Kindness begins with leaders caring about the success of others. To be influential and build relationships we need to put the focus on seeing things from team member’s perspectives. When we have differences in how a project should be completed, ask the other person why they chose a certain direction. Maybe they have a point and their ideas will lead to a stronger deliverable for a customer. Don’t make assumptions but rather allow your heart and brain to move in unison.
When leaders allow their hearts and minds to move in tandem their kindness rules. Share on X2. Design Clear Expectations
It was a point of disconnection with the organization I worked with about what each team and department expected from one another. It caused immense friction and delayed deadlines. Issues weren’t resolved. No one felt accountable. What does it look like to set clear expectations?
- Collaborate with all stakeholders on what each person is responsible for.
- Use language and metrics that everyone understands and agrees to.
- Put the expectations in writing for everyone to see.
3. Include Stakeholders When Making Modifications
Many leaders work on fast-paced teams that may need to pivot quickly to meet customers’ changing demands. When a new direction is required it is so important for leaders to partner with their team members in deciding how to adjust. A kindhearted leader understands that when change is needed they can’t do it alone and nor should they offer change without consulting all the stakeholders. When leaders rally their troops and ask for input they are showing others that their opinions and ideas matter.
4. Create Respectful Communication
The way a leader shares their message and interacts with their colleagues will impact the end deliverable. To build rapport among team members there needs to be honest, healthy and respectful connections. That all begins with communicating in a professional and kind way.
- Spend more time listening than speaking. There will be plenty of time to share your ideas, but first understand what others are suggesting.
- Set up guidelines on how to share information and deal with conflicting perspectives. A list of conflict norms is essential.
- Be inclusive by asking for input and not putting down opinions.
- Use a tone and body language that is approachable and open.
5. Add Gratitude To Team Culture
Leaders who add gratitude to their leadership strategy will be the most influential. They will often have highly engaged teams who want to work their hardest and share their most innovative ideas. I have seen this with clients who show empathy and compassion when team members are struggling or need an advocate. Kindness is contagious. Saying thank you and telling others how much you appreciate their contributions will kick your leadership to the next level.
How have you added kindness to your leadership? Do you know a leader who epitomizes kind leadership?
Hi Terri,
I LOVE the first point you make .. Find your heartbeat. For so many years, leaders were trained to overlook their heart and listen only to their mind. Well, we saw where that got us. And today’s workers turn their back away from heartless leaders.
Great post and wonderful inspiration. Will share.
Kate
I agree that heartless leaders are often ignored and usually not very impactful. When leaders let their hearts work with their minds to drive their decisions and actions, team members feel more engaged and connected.
Thanks Kate for your insights!
Hello Terri, and thanks for this greatful post.
I love you pointing out that, when leaders rally their troops and ask for input they are showing others that their opinions and ideas matter. That is really what a leader is and not a dictator, no matter the size of the organization.
Thanks again
Danielle Alice Desanges Aucéane
Asking for input and ideas is critical for innovation and growth on any team. It empowers everyone to feel part of the bigger picture as well as helps build buy-in for an organization’s mission.
Thanks so much for stopping by and adding your wonderful comments, Danielle!
I’ve found that when we include all stakeholders in the decision making process, it signals that leadership cares about the opinion of others. It also avoids making the impression that leadership has all the answers…of utmost importance, however, is that leadership really does respect diverse opinions. Again, it’s all about communication skills…
Communicating in a clear and respectful way is key to strong relationships in our workplaces. Often it is misunderstood messages that leads to unclear direction for team members. Kindness is listening and validating the suggestions from the stakeholders which in turn will lead to more outstanding deliverables.
Thanks LaRae for adding your terrific ideas!
I was so happy to find this article. One of my core values is kindness and I have a sign in my office that says “If you can be anything, be kind” as a reminder to myself to be true to my values. So often I have heard from other leaders “You are too nice, I bet you have a hard time getting respect.” Actually, not at all! Quite the opposite in fact!
I love the words on your sign in your office and I agree that when we lead with kindness we will be way more influential. Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your story and insights, Amber!
And the first kindness is paying attention
I agree that paying attention is an awesome way to show others kindness and respect. Thanks for sharing your thoughts William!